AL GORE FOUND FROZEN IN SAGINAW! Ex Vice President and Doomsday theorist Al Gore was found frozen in a local residents yard this week. “It was inconvenient all right” stated local resident B. Lyttle. “This always happens whenever any of the global warmers visit Michigan.” “Apparently Mr. Gore was passing through trying to promote his movie “An Inconvenient Truth” when he got out of his high-mileage limo to quickly relieve himself in a taxpayers yard. Well, by the time he spelled out Al G in the snow, he was frozen solid!” What are you going to do with him now, we asked. “We’d thaw him out but our heat bills are too high in this area. So we’ll just stick him behind the shed til’ Spring”.