LOCAL MAN ESCAPES TIME TRAVEL VORTEX!
As Saginaw Conspiracy reporters ere hard at work a Bay City man burst through the doors of our expansive offices and declared that he had just escaped the elusive time travel vortex we have reported on in the past.
Eddie "Ahlzie" Bipps recounted his tale to us: "I had just left my grandson's house and was speeding down I-75 at 25mph, heading back to the retirement home. I turned on the radio to 96.1 and there I was, in the middle of the time travel vortex! The radio was playing the same exact music I had listened to back in the 50s! I didn't know how to escape the vortex so I just pulled to the side of the road to let some of the five miles of angry traffic that always follows me, go by. That’s when I knew I came back to our time, they didn't have expletives like that back in the 50s!"
After pouring his Geritol and Metamucil mixer we promised the heroic Mr. Bipps that our crack team of reporters would bring this phenomenon to light! Beware of the vortex!