ZILWAUKEE CHEERLEADING SQUAD WINS THE FINALS
The residents of Zilwaukee are cheering the victory of the Zilwaukee Cheerleading Squad over the reigning champs, the Omer Tech Nostrils.
Gortina, the large yet beautiful squad captain (shown in photo being hoisted) said, "We took care of those pansies Tonya Harding style!"
Also in the photo is Percyville McCleod (lifting Gortina), "Thank God I had my vertibrae replaced by a titanium steel rod!" he declared.
The Zilwaukee Cheerleading Squad needs to train extra hard this year because the Midland Pompous Poms have just formed to try to take the championship for next season! "Bring it on!", Gortina stated "I've been eating my Steroid-O's for breakfast every morning! Then I eat the bowl for dessert!"